Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
