.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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