He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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