I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
