He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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