please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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