Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
