I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
