fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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