I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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