some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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