i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
