we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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