I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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