Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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