I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I don't deserve a penis
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I want to fling myself into the sun
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
