mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
