she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
i just had sex bonerless
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
