Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
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