I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize