Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
