While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
