have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
