Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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