is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
you inspire me to be a worse person
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Found the puke drawer
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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