i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
