Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Randomize
