also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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