Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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