just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
