Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
