In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
are you so shy because you have an std?
I love having hate sex.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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