Are we in a gay sports bar?
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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