Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
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