i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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