Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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