Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
