hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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