STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
