STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
