Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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