so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
