check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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