So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
