Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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