Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I puked a lego.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
