Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
