If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
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