it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize