We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
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