Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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