Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
