I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
